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16 May 2004 @ 08:38 pm
I think that I should be in the performing arts. Just cause.. I hate to let my gifts go to waste. But yet.. I don’t want to perform. I don’t want an audience. I guess I feel it as an invasion of self. This is who I am, this is what I like to do.. for me. Though I suppose we need an audience to validate ourselves? And you can’t get paid for the things you do in private. No one will buy it if no one ever sees.

I thought about some things that might work for me... Working at the renaissance fair. I would love to just dress up and go out and act in character. That would be something I’d enjoy, that I’d be interested in even if money were not involved. But the negative things.. I’d have to be up and dressed and ready at a specific time, probably early. It’s only for the summer.

A band. I’m actually starting to realize.. I can sing. Fairly decently at least. No, I’m not likely to be an American Idol (I hate that show anyway), but for the type of music I like, my voice works fine. And I could also lend my talents on the violin. I can play bass too.. well, songs I know. And I can’t sing and play at the same time, except for songs like For Whom the Bell Tolls, hehe. So yeah, a band might be a possibility, if I could find some people with the same interests and such. My brother likely has some connections too. Though the only issue I might have is with live performances. I’ve never actually sung for other people before. And I don’t know if I have the devotion to choose this as a career path.

Acting. I would love to act in movies or television. If I could find a story and a character I loved, I could get so into it and enjoy myself. The problem is, I’m not sure where to start. It’s not likely someone will just walk up to me and ask if I want to be in a movie. I might need to take classes, and find connections, and get an agent, and whatever else. And I’m not sure if I’m ready for all that. There’s a local film company in Denver which I was able to be an extra for one of their movies, though not sure if that really counts as acting experience. And how often are they going to be auditioning for parts? Where else is there that could make this a viable career option for me?

Theater. I’m sure it’s far more likely I’d find parts available for stage actors than movies or television here in Colorado. And I may even be able to employ my singing talents. The problem with this? Well, I think most people know that I’m quiet. Not just conversation wise, I mean voice wise. I don’t have a very loud voice. Even when I’m acting in character, I’m not sure I can speak loud enough without it sounding forced. So that could make things difficult. And being on stage in front of an audience... At least in movies or tv (most shows anyway) the audience isn’t right there watching you. And if you mess up, you can cut and do it again.

I’ve also thought about maybe getting a job at our animal hospital. They have a kennel there and they need someone to be there all night, so that might be a possibility. I could have flexible hours, it’s closeby, and I’d get to be around cute puppies and kitties. *snicker*

Some other things... I could write music. I’m fairly good at coming up with different melodies. It just could be hard writing an entire score for a full orchestra. I guess I could do solo or duet parts easily enough. Another interest I have is art. Not sure how far I could get with the kind of stuff I draw now, but I’m sort of interested in photography. Of course, for that, I’d need to take classes and such. So.. it’s just another possibility I suppose.

Now.. one of these must surely be able to work for me, right?
CriScOcrisco747 on May 16th, 2004 07:46 pm (UTC)
Maybe I'll have to keep you in mind if someone I know needs someone for a female character's voice, then. No cameras, no audience, just you in a booth. Of course that would only be a temporary thing on the side, though...
The Other Grendel Slayer: moobeerwulf on May 16th, 2004 09:10 pm (UTC)
Cool! Just remember that you start at the bottom and work your way up, and that every little thing you is a step towards the final goal. Even auditioning for parts you know you won't get, for instance. It's practice for you. :) That way you'll be used to the idea and won't be as nervous about auditioning for roles you do want, and perhaps be less worried about performing.

The thing with a lot of these options is that they don't demand you to be perfect to begin with. You've voiced your worries about performing in front of others, but with the band and the theatre (which is also possibly the most reliable path towards getting on camera) you won't be performing straight away - you'll be practicing with your band and/or doing dress rehearsals and such well before you have to take it 'on the road'. :)