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17 December 2002 @ 12:08 am
 
My brother came over today. His car had died, in his words, "It's like driving a stick shift, only harder." I don't remember how many times he said it stalled on the way over here... But, he went with my parents and bought a used Jeep Grand Cherokee, finally got his leather seats too. He took us younger siblings for a drive around the block. It got me thinking about what kind of car I wanted to get. Well, my sister's pestering helped too. She seems to think that if I get a car, she will be able to drive it once she gets her license...

About halfway through the hockey game tonight, I started to feel depressed. I'm not really sure why either... I find myself asking "why?" alot. Like why I feel a certain way about certain people. And why I let myself get this way. And when will I be able to break out of my "solitary shell" and just be a girl... A normal girl, doing normal people things. Sometimes I don't feel normal... Alot of times I don't. And I wonder what's real.

*sigh* I don't know what's real, and what's right for me... I just want to curl up and hide for awhile. I want to be beautiful. I want to be someone's angel. I want to be happy. I want to know that I'm doing what's right. I want to open some people's minds. And I don't want to fail...

That I may be good...
 
 
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: Dream Theater - Through Her Eyes
 
 
 
Vivinusvivinus on December 17th, 2002 03:15 am (UTC)
Life is what you make it, it's not handed to you and tells you to deal with it.

If it makes you feel any better, my mind is opened every time we talk, and you don't need someone to make you an angel, angel.

..And don't get me started on that beautiful subject.