Marianne (resplendentposy) wrote,

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My brother came over today. His car had died, in his words, "It's like driving a stick shift, only harder." I don't remember how many times he said it stalled on the way over here... But, he went with my parents and bought a used Jeep Grand Cherokee, finally got his leather seats too. He took us younger siblings for a drive around the block. It got me thinking about what kind of car I wanted to get. Well, my sister's pestering helped too. She seems to think that if I get a car, she will be able to drive it once she gets her license...

About halfway through the hockey game tonight, I started to feel depressed. I'm not really sure why either... I find myself asking "why?" alot. Like why I feel a certain way about certain people. And why I let myself get this way. And when will I be able to break out of my "solitary shell" and just be a girl... A normal girl, doing normal people things. Sometimes I don't feel normal... Alot of times I don't. And I wonder what's real.

*sigh* I don't know what's real, and what's right for me... I just want to curl up and hide for awhile. I want to be beautiful. I want to be someone's angel. I want to be happy. I want to know that I'm doing what's right. I want to open some people's minds. And I don't want to fail...

That I may be good...
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