Marianne (resplendentposy) wrote,

My Glass Prison...

Crawling to my glass prison
A place where no one knows
My secret lonely world begins
So much safer here
A place where I can go
To forget about my daily sins

Life here in my glass prison
A place I once called home
Fall in nocturnal bliss again
Chasing a long lost friend
I no longer can control
Just waiting for this hopelessness to end

Help me - I can't break out of this prison all alone
Save me - I'm drowning and I'm hopeless on my own
Heal me - I can't restore my sanity alone

I wrote these last night...


I dislike being around people.
Because when I'm around people, I feel "fake".
Why do I feel fake?
Because I never show my true self.
Why don't I show my true self?
Because I feel the need to protect it.
Why must I protect my true self?
Because I'm afraid.
I'm afraid of showing other people who I am.
I'm afraid that they'll destroy that fragile beauty I've created.
I'm afraid of rejection.
I'm afraid of being hurt.
I'm afraid that no one will understand.
I'm afraid of being out there.. alone...
So I conceal it all away.
Because it's so much safer here.
In my mind, no one can harm me.
No one can tell me I'm wrong, or bad, or imperfect.
Because I am perfect.
I am me.
But I'm so afraid...
I'm afraid to say I don't need someone.
I'm afraid to say I'm happy on my own.
I'm afraid to admit I'm already whole.
Because I feel so empty...


I try so hard to change the outside.
Even though I'm perfect in and out.
Yet that outside, I never show to anyone...
And I wonder why I receive no praise.
So I feel that there's something wrong.
And I try to fix it.
An endless cycle...


Such a fragile beauty
Crying blessed tears
Trapped for all eternity
In the prison she herself has forged
She's built her own glass walls
Locked the door, destroyed the key
Curled up in her sorrow
How she forgets her own perfection
When no one is there to praise her
For she's turned them all away
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